Lamentations


“When you wake up in the morning, be thankful for a new day”, I was always told as a child. But lately I wake up in the morning and all I want to do is lament. Everything can be seemly going great. My job is great, I am in good health, but my mum is ill. How can I be happy and thankful when I feel like she is getting the raw end of the deal from our dear God who she has loved and diligently served all her life. She keeps telling me it is all Gods will and I feel my faith die a little more. Yes, this is the one thing that is dragging me down when all else is seemingly going great. I know these bodies are not meant to last forever but I hoped she would be happy and contented in her old age. I hoped that He would have mercy on her and give her peace in her final years. I hoped that she would be traveling and enjoying her pension. I hoped that, we would finally have peace and good health. Is that too much to ask for?

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Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: it is easier to say “My tooth is aching” than to say “My heart is broken”. ―C.S. Lewis

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5 thoughts on “Lamentations

  1. My Dad died a month ago and last Saturday, the family interned his ashes at one of his favorite nature areas. I can certainly relate to your story, however the very beginning of your tale reminded me of one of my favorite quotes:

    “When you awake in the morning, learn something to inspire you and mediate upon it, then plunge forward full of light with which to illuminate the darkness.” -Rabbi Tzvi Freeman

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Tough one Joy. Keep hoping, keeping praying. The older I get I seem to find that death and illness is never fair. We are not entitled to longer lives than we are meant to have and although we would like to die without pain and with mor dignity we are as in T.S. Eliots poem,’The Wasteland, where her writes. “This is the way the world ends / Not with a bang but a whimper.” Death and sickness is fair to no one but hope springs eternal so we spend our days the best we can, one at a time, knowing time is short but having faith for the best. Sorry I don’t mean to be depressing. Prayers for you and your Mom, that she will heal.

    Liked by 1 person

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